It’s been quite a long time since my last post. This year, 2011, has been quite odd (you can’t say it’s been a bad one, nor complain of it; it’s not politically correct).
I’m gradual and inexorably reaching one of those crossroad dilemmas and I seriously have to reconsider my life and where I am heading to. Yes, I also collect bad wines.
I needn’t pass through a terrible experience to know it. I’m simply not very (to say the less) satisfied with my life (and yes, I know many people are feeling the same, but this does not mitigates this feeling). I really feel like lost. My mind says something is broken here.
At my age, I feel that people surrounding me (including those supposedly closer to me) don’t respect me; I feel continuously questioned (and almost sabotaged) in every, including the pettier, aspect or decision I try to take on my own life. And it ends up being frustrating, exhausting and, at my age, hard (it’s almost like going back to my childhood). I wonder myself what is my mistake, because it’s clear that part (if not all) the problem lies on my side.
But that hasn’t been the hardest part: the toughest one is seeing how those few people who do accept, endorse, encourages and enlighten me, or just I felt some affinity are not among us (passed away) or have moved really far away.
This has been a somewhat sad end of year, with that feeling of any past time was better.
Anyway, I don’t give up. It’s time to open that bottle of wine, now that it’s still good: